Martin Luther King Jr. has been inspiration to me for over 10 Years. When I was 8 Years old I Stood on top of a Jungle Gym and yelled the words "Free at last, free at last, THANK GOD ALMIGHTY, I'm free at last!!!!". When people were learning his "I Have A Dream Speech" I was interested in his "Drum Major" Speech because I have A Dream was a requirement, while I Was interested and didn't do it because I Was Obligated to.

Malcolm X has always had my heart, and at heart I feel like my mind, thoughts, and beliefs Embody all that Malcolm was; however Martin has always had my Ears and above all of that My Respect!

I can honestly say that even though I disagreed with his "Non-Violence" approach at gaining civil rights, he was successful in helping black people gain rights and become alot more active in America. I appreciate him for my voting rights, I appreciate him every time I sit in the front of a bus and can remain there if I choose to, without forfeiting my seat to the first Caucasian passenger that boards and is in need of a seat.

I thank him every time I See Barack Obama addressing the Nation as The 1st Black President Of The United States Of America (Even though I have my differences with some things he does as president).

Thanks for everything Dr. King

I Put My heart In This and I Deserve To be here....

This is my new Theme song, I always said when I make it, Imma blast Biggies Juicy, Im playing this song directly after it.



Download: Preme The Prez Ft. Kayla Bliss - I Deserve To Be here.

One of my first interviews was with this next guy. We hardly speak now, but I'm still proud of him and he's definitely doing his thing. P.S. dont think it was easy, he's been doing this for a long time, this guy really struggled.

She must see something equivalent to my nightmares and bad dreams because I hate to close my eyes at night, the same way she hates to open her eyes and look at me.

They say "Shenda, Sometimes he tests you. Just look at it this way, in the end you can say that you really are a strong black woman. You been through so many messed up situations where people have let you down, disappointed you, disrespected you, lied, cheated, and abused you ... and you never lost your goodness. You're a REAL strong black woman. Not like these other bitches just pretending"

.... I Say nothing. I think, I gotta go through all of this shit just to say im strong? Pretending like these bitches seem more exciting and fun
But I'll never take the easy way out.

After 3 failed relationships (attempts at the "L" word), I bought a journal. On a piece of paper in that journal, that I started 3 years ago, there is a page that looks like this...

My New Definition Of Love

Love; Noun, Verb: ________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
_____________________________________________
...and the blank lines continue all the way down the page.

I put the task of defining the L word off as often as possible, because I don't know what love is. I don't even like saying it most of the time.

However I know that Love is not only a noun describing a person place or thing but its also a Verb, an action word, and I don't want someone who simply wants to be the noun of my life without putting in the verb.

....and I Knew when My hands wouldn't move, and the paper remained a deafening, blinding white, and empty lines were where words should have been yelling, and screaming from; maybe everything was ok.

I could write, but i couldn't write anymore.

Not like I wanted to. I couldn't capture their hearts because what I did was from the heart, what I did was through my own pain, in hopes to help them with theirs. Now... Im just stuck in the middle of a big ass hurricane; the eye of the storm is always quiet.

To My readers, those who actually enjoy, and read, and love..... I apologize.
I'll be back but I'm enjoying happiness and freedom from emotional distress right now.

Dont worry, because I'm not typing, doesnt mean that I'm not writing anymore. I keep a pen and a wideruled marble notebook on me at all times, jotting down schitzo worthy thoughts.

Ladies and gentlemen I have had two people make reference to me not reading their blog. I also haven't been posting on my very own. I've been busy getting A's on all my papers and trying to be a social butterfly lol. I have so many things im trying to do as well as keeping up with my on campus organizations and make a name for myself before...

*AHEM* Teems knows this. I'll tell you later Teems

Back to the general audience. Anyway...

Jaycee, I do apologize hun, your blog will definitely be read when I sign on, Sasha, I see the new blog, and I'll be checking in from time to time. Any One else want to hang me for not reading and commenting, dont worry, I'll come through.

BUT LET ME BE CLEAR, if you aren't writing about anything, then I'm not commenting. I don't care about fashion (Unless your Allyson) and I don't care about entertainment news, or entertainers. Just great topics, and great discussions, hell I'll even read a poem or two.... but don't give me nonsense overload.


Back to this paper I'm working on...

Ciao Bella's and Boys!

You know something; there are alot of great Black Artists, but Black fans are always comparing their artists and trying to make an artist and their music less great than it really is. Like Comparing Nas to Hov... WHY? Two Different men, two different types of music, under the same Genre.

You don't hear white people saying "Well you know... Elvis was hot, but Frank Sinatra is better because ...."

We need to let our artist be great and stop ripping them apart on shows, in blogs, and on the radio. It's usually only Black Owned Blogs, and Black Bloggers who disrespect black artist.

That's Like comparing Nicki Minaj to Lil' Kim, why cant Nicki be Nicki, and Kim be Kim. Yeah, Kim is a pioneer,a nd a woman who originated her style of rap (because of course we had MC Lite and Queen Latifah before her) and that's why Kim is great (In My Opinion), but let Nicki Minaj be Nicki Minaj.

I named this Nas because I Love Nas, and I Was Listening to The Message when The light bulb moment came about. Y'all know how random I am.

A while back I happily posted a story about Roxanne Shante' and her apparent victory over the music industry. She claimed that she had recieved her PhD in psychology from cornell university after Warner music had put a clause in her contract in which they were forced to honor by the courts. Well; she lied. Isn't that something?

Im clearly disappointed in her especially because her story was obviously a rags to riches victory over "the man" type story. Anyway according to an article on Slate's website:

• According to Warner, neither it nor any of its subsidiary record labels ever had a contract with Shanté, and it was not obligated to pay for her education. Indeed, there's no evidence that it ever did.
• Shanté—real name Lolita Shanté Gooden—doesn't have a Ph.D. from Cornell or anywhere else. Indeed, she admitted it in an interview with Slate. And Cornell has no record of Gooden (or "Shanté") ever attending or receiving a degree.
  
• According to Marymount Manhattan College records, Shanté enrolled there but dropped out less than four months later without ever earning a degree.
  
• New York state records indicate that no one named Lolita Gooden or Roxanne Shanté is licensed to practice psychology or any related field.

Im obviously disappointed, Roxanne Shante eventually released an 'apology' in which she says:

I would like to thank my long time fans and supporters for your continued support. I am humbled and grateful to all of you for that. Without going into all of the details as of right now, I would like to apologize that this story regarding my post recording career has caused such a ruckus. The entire story will be revealed at a later time.

Thats interesting, she's not even aknowledging that she lied. I won't even bother looking for her story to be revealed later on because she lied and its been proven.

I'll be back. I have stuff in my drafts that I Need to finish. I'm talking about life, healthcare, and .... A Bunch of other stuff. My Lifee is in turmoil... Lol

Later!!

DISCLAIMER: This is NOT to disrespect any people affiliated with any Greek sororities and Fraternities. I'm expressing my feelings and showing you my experiences while away at college. An HBCU to be exact.

INCIDENT 1

The other day we had a mixer outside, I believe it was being held by the Alpha's and they were strolling, and stepping. It looked almost like a probate, but it wasn't. A young lady who was an AKA pushed me, so that she could see what was going on.

If you knew/know me, you'd know that the bitch didn't have to push me, all she had to do was ask say "excuse me". I could care less about watching them "stomp the yard". I can watch the movie and see that sexy brown skin bald head guy from the movie for all of that. So me being the schizophrenic Brooklynite that I am hit her with the "Excuse me" insert mad attitude as you say/read that. She turns around and someone says "Girl you better chill, she's an AKA"

*Insert Eye roll and "I don't give a *expletive*" here*

INCIDENT 2

A young lady was allegedly hospitalized after an object was flung into her face by a member of Delta Sigma Theta. Instead of people criticizing the delta's for their actions they crucified the young girl who eventually told about the hazing. They said things like "Th bitch wasn't cut out for it, she shoulda kept her mouth closed". Really?
I mean, theirs no sympathy for the girl who was hospitalized? or the other girl who told what was going on and had to change her school because they wouldn't leave her alone?

They're just lucky it wasn't me, or someone else like me, because I would have gotten my hands on a licensed gun and defended myself.

Most Greeks would label me a hater, or something else simply because I'm not affiliated, yet I will speak against them and some of their unruly actions. The joke is on them. I never actually took the steps necessary to actually join them. Me being from New York, where your Greek organization doesn't mean more than the next chicks Blood affiliation, it just so happens that joining a sorority no longer means shit to me, especially after I've seen the damage they do to people considered outsiders. The way people idolize and praise them disgusts me. I don't see you in church (only for those who deem themselves to be religious people), reading the Bible, or praising God, yet you know every AKA by name, and her whole life story, what state she's from and who her boyfriend is. WHERE THEY DO THAT AT?

I still have respect for the Delta's on ASU's campus even though that horrible incident took place, because I've witnessed them do alot of community service IN THE COMMUNITY. When I say 'in the community', I mean in Montgomery. Not simply doing things abroad to make themselves look good and get recognized. .

However, alot of the other Greek organizations seem to simply just BE there. I don't see them doing much of anything besides wearing their Blues, yellows, pinks, greens, and purples. (I have seen the brothers of Alpha Phi Alpha partake in alot of awareness programs on campus, I commend them for that so they can be excluded from that list of people who hardly do anything)

I'm tired of dealing with their gang mentality. What in that girls correct, sane mind would let her think that she could push me out the way, to see her "Brothers" step and I would be OK with that?

Greeks and Gangs?



many people say that Greeks can't be compared to gangs, because - of course Greeks don't go around engaging in criminal activity .....or do they? I believe their initiation practices are very criminal and can be compared to those of Bloods, Crips, and Latin Kings. Hazing is criminal, illegal, and against Greek letter organization policy. On ASU's campus, if you mess with one Q-Dog, you mess with them all, and PLEASE, don't even attempt to speak out against these people and the things that you dislike about them. You might be in danger of getting bullied, or run the chance of having to physically defend yourself against them. I'm a Brooklynite, and Schizophrenic is in front of that title. I was crazy before I was a brooklynite (Which means I was thinking crazy thoughts before my mother let the doctors cut me out. See, I didn't even want anything to do with the coochie, they had to cut me out the belly, or my mother would still be pregnant today) so I'm not afraid of anything, especially not people.

I think that the Greek Organizations on ASU's Campus need new direction and leadership. They need to actually do what they are supposed to do; like, empower women, and emancipate the minds of young men. They need to be a "sista" and "brotha" to all men and women, not just their sorors and Frat brothers. Its time that they serve the community and give back to the people who actually invest in their existence and support them no matter what controversy they are being accused of (like the beating, and hospitalization of a young lady while being hazed last semester who was a Delta pledge). O