"Girl, he aint shit, he just like every other nigga out here, you know they all dogs, I Swear..NIGGAS AINT SHIT" my homegirl would tell me everytime i told her how upset i was with "Mister". She would tell me how stupid he was making me look, how she knew in her heart that he was cheating when he said he was going to work on his days off, and how she would try to get me to call his phone blocked to see if he was ignoring my calls because my name popped up on his caller I.D. when i called.

It was definitely partly my fault because i only told her negative, I never expressed how i never had to need or want for anything, how he treated me great, how he loved me and wanted me around forever. I only complained about how he didn't answer when I called, how he always wanted to hang with his boys when i wanted him home.

I remember the games she used to try to get me to play, pretending to be some girl that he didn't really meet at a party he went to once. Or some girl with the wrong number who thought he sounded cute, and tried to flirt with him.

I remember it vividly. I remember how she would tell me how she saw him in the food court with unknown girls, chicks she didn't know. She would tell me how they sat in a booth at the food court laughing, and how the girls hand would be in his lap as he talked to her with a smile on his face.

"THAT NIGGA AINT SHIT, I'm telling you, he just like your ex"

I started to believe her, i started to feel stupid, i started to feel like he wasn't working on his days off for extra money, even though his checks were bigger every week, i started to believe that he was in the malls smiling all up in some other females face, i could see them smiling, her hands all over him, even though i knew his sister was in town, and had invited me out to the mall with them. I envisioned him picking up girls in the club and pocketing their numbers even though i washed his clothes and i never found any evidence of that. Then i thought to myself "It's 2009, maybe the numbers are in his blackberry" even though i had his passwords to his phone, and could go through it as i pleased.

I started to believe that i was being made into his fool, even though he treated me right. I started believing he was just like my ex, i even pictured the ex's face on the new love interest's' face. I don't know if he could tell but i turned into 007, Bond, James Bond. Checking Phones, Myspaces, cracking e-mail codes and shit like i was the government, The Bush Administration didn't have a damn thing on me.

The more she filled my head with shit, the more i twisted his words as they came out of his mouth, love meant that he would cheat and he didn't really care, he said it just to shut me up when i fussed about him hanging with his friends. His words morphed from vows of love and sweet words into deceitful lies.

When he said one thing, I heard another. The more my 'friend' told me about how he was no good, a liar,

...the more she fucked with my mind, the more i pushed him away

I remember it all vividly. I remember starting arguments over little things, i remember getting caught in the midst of these junior high school games that i was playing with a grown ass man, i remember it vividly.

The more she fucked with my head...the more i pushed him away.

I remember, the fights, the yelling, the screaming, the breaking up, and being stubborn, not talking to him until he wanted to make up. Then she would make me feel dumb, tell me i need to leave him for good and....

The more she fucked with my thoughts...the more i pushed him away.

I remember pushing him so far away, that there was no coming back for him. He was done. I remember .....and Now he's living with the next bitch
2 kids
big house
married.

I remember.....feeling stupid, because i let a perfectly good man go because she told me to.

Let this be a lesson ladies, because the love we had no longer belongs to we, it belongs to him and her.

Listening to them friends.....